One of THE WORST Poker-Related Movies Ever.

[AceDeuceNoUse]

Shade - 2003
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Netflix Description:
A trio of grifters (Thandie Newton, Gabriel Byrne and Stuart Townsend) plots the con of a lifetime when they scheme to hustle a notorious card shark known as "the Dean" (Sylvester Stallone). But in order to bankroll their plan, they cheat a gangster in a rigged poker game. Now, all bets are off when the murderous mobster comes looking for payback. Jamie Foxx and Melanie Griffith co-star in this twisting tale of deception, danger and double cross.
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I happened to come across this while searching Netflix for other poker-related DVDs, so I thought, "Meh, Gabriel Byrne, a little poker theme, how much could it suck?" Answer: "Plenty."

Save yourself queue slot, folks. Any true poker player will just be sickened by the portrayals of players in "high stakes" games. String raises, cheap-ass chips, plastic coated Bee/Bicycle cards, sloppy stacks, ridiculous calls. Hollywood? Sure. But no poker pro/maven/student worth his salt would lay claim to being an advisor to this film.

To be fair, the primary focus of the film (I think - it was hard to tell sometimes) was the grifting, not necessarily the poker games; but they could have least shown SOME effort towards paying respect to the game we so love. Perhaps all the consulting funds went to the card sharps performing the close-up sleight-of-hand tricks during the opening credits (which were, I'll grant, pretty freaking amazing).

The choppiness of the scene inter-cuts made it difficult to settle into the flow of important dialog. I felt as if the director assumed everyone watching would have ADD.

Stallone actually looked better in this last Rocky film than he does here. I don't know who did his makeup, but it made him look like death warmed over. Melanie Griffith just looked luke-warm, as opposed to the red-hot that I used to admire.

Gabriel Byrne was the consummate professional; I just wish he were a player instead of the ringleader. I have a feeling he would have studied more of the mannerisms of the long-time grinders.

Thandie Newton's talent (and beauty...) took her character as far as it could go, which actually made for a few watchable scenes, but these were few and far between.

Jamie Foxx's acting talent obviously hadn't peaked yet, and his portrayal of an up and coming poker hustler was disappointing (almost annoying). Yapping about "Holla back" after each raise did nothing to endear me to his character. If that's the characterization he was aiming for, I guess he succeeded. He obviously didn't feel the need to copy any mannerisms of someone who actually plays the game, perhaps because he had only 2 real game scenes to worry about.

Even the 'con job' aspects of the film didn't feel "earned" - they felt obligatory. I wasn't sold on the perceptions of belief on the part of the different "marks", thus I was never surprised by the reveal. Oh, and they stole Edward G. Robinson's final line from 'The Cincinnati Kid' ; I haven't decided if I think that was a lame attempt at a tribute or an outright insult to one of the greatest (if not THE greatest - don't hurt me Teddy KGB) poker films.

Nothing much to see here folks.


(and yes, that's Michael Dorn in his "lucky" porkpie hat, aka Worf from Star Trek TNG.)

[kodiak]

Great review and thanks for saving me from putting it in my queue.

[The Mind Reader]

*shrug* I liked it

But I also saw it before I was into poker. Recently re-rented it to check out again, but haven't yet. Wonder if my opinion will change

[jojobinks]

well put. i recently saw it and tried to repress the memory. i ty sir for bringing it back up

[BigWoody]

I saw this on Spike TV like... a year ago?

My best friend and I had a good laugh over it. The end is hilarious... when The Dean cools the deck somehow. Didn't he go 'all in' for more than the kid had, so the kid had to borrow enough to cover The Dean's bet, otherwise he forfitted the pot... wow. So borrows a bunch of money from his friends b/c he has trip Jacks. Then we get a hole card cam of Dean's card and he has 2 pair, but when he turns over his hand it becomes trip Queens...? Yeah, and then it just ends... great ending by the way... lol.

[bmwguy525]

lol I couldn't agree more. I've thought this since I saw it, but I didn't think other people were dumb enough to watch it as well, so I kept my mouth shut to hide the embarrassment.

[MeridianFC]

"Shade" does pretty much blow. I bought it a couple of years back for $5.99 as a previously viewed from Blockbuster. I bought it sight unseen just because of the subject matter. Crap film. Flimsy plot, marginal acting jobs at best, and er..that the highpoints.

The sole saving grace is the filming of the sleight of hand work. For the price I paid it was more than worth it. Some stunning Ricky Jay level stuff. The best part is watching from under the glass.

[Wooderson]

Originally Posted by MeridianFC

The sole saving grace is the filming of the sleight of hand work. For the price I paid it was more than worth it. Some stunning Ricky Jay level stuff. The best part is watching from under the glass.

Quoted for truth. The only reason to rent this movie is to watch the extra stuff about cardplay.

[PFunk]

I bought this for $4.99 shipped off ebay awhile back. Obviously not a masterpiece by any means, but I thought it was an OK movie. If you have no interest in cards then obviously its a lose, but the topic was its saving grace for me, so I enjoyed watching it for what it was. A bad movie based around cards/gambling etc.


P.

[WINTERS]

Given the lack of selection of poker related movies, I liked it.